The Monthly Rag

Maybe this should be called the daily poop...But that would imply posts would go up on a daily basis and that shit just aint gonna happen.

Friday, November 27, 2009


This year, I have so much to be thankful for and I don't mean the bullshit thankfulness either, I mean 2009 ended up being one of the best years of my life. First Cole is doing an amazing job at school. His behavior has vastly improved (at least when he is with me) and he is getting brighter and brighter with each passing day. There is nothing like good old parental pride to get you up in the mornings. I am very thankful for my son.

I still have a job (knock on wood). They say the economy is picking back up, but frankly, I have yet to see evidence of this, especially at work. I am very thankful for financial independence.

Kitty Claw and I finally came to a peaceful truce. If she starts to claw on me or act aggressive, I throw her outside until she can pull her shit together. Usually after about 10 minutes, she's ready to come back in and behave. She is actually very welcomed company when she curls up next to me, purring and acting like a sweet, loving member of the family. My feelings towards her are starting to warm. I am very thankful for harmony.

I got out of the worst relationship in my life this year. I won't elaborate on this but it affected me on a personal and professional level and though I am still feeling some after-effects, my quality of life skyrocketed the minute it was over. I'm not going to say that it was all his fault, I take most of the responsibility for actively blinding myself to the signs (they were there, oh were they there). I'm just thrilled to be free from the concrete blocks that were attached to my feet by unkept promises and smoke and mirrors. I also learned a very valuable lesson; a paper trail never, ever lies. The paper trail is ultimately what unbound me, it validated my doubts, vaporized the smoke screen and reflected reality.
A paper trail is the most honest assessment of a person's true nature. You can discover everything about a person, what foods they like, what their hobbies are, do they love their family, do they have a job, do they pay their taxes, do they tithe, do they have a sweet tooth, if they are generous, are they responsible, do they prefer mac over pc, do they have friends, do they drink too much, do they like to travel, do they have kids, etc. The list goes on and on. I am thankful that I woke up in time to finally hear the screaming paper trail and smell the scent of detergent on freshly laundered clothes after a long hard day of sweating in the hot sun. I am very thankful for clarity.

I am getting back into the best shape of my life AND finding a healthy way to deal with stress. I feel trim and fit and as a direct result, I have to some degree halted the aging process (at least I feel like I have in my brain). My mind feels younger and more agile. I am very thankful for my health.

Roberta has become one of my most beloved of friends. We laugh a lot, we cry, we share. She is a wonderful spectator and an honest commentator. We disagree on certain issues, but then we still hug at the end of the day and say "see you tomorrow, neighbor." I am very thankful for my neighbor.

But most of all, I am very thankful that after all the mistakes made, the tears shed, the laughs shared, we get the opportunity to put our heads down on our soft fluffy pillows and wake up the next morning and do it all again, but just a little bit wiser.

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